Monday 30 September 2013

Following Through

My son (11yrs) is banned or grounded. 

He's a smart kid. Probably one of the smartest kids in his school and that's not being biased either (really). He has always been part of the gifted and talented group at pretty much every school he's been to. We've moved a lot in his young life, so there is a few schools. Last term he was selected for a writers group and was published. Published, I say!  We've been told he's either going to be some genius (as in Big Bang Theory) or a criminal mastermind (as in Oceans 11-13). 

The natural man's reaction (ok, mine) first instinct was 'sweet!' Either way, I am going to be well taken care of! Hahahaha! 

But I digress..... The genius child is banned. We call it banned because that's what it is. He is banned from electronics and drawing. The things that he loves the most and the things that will make this whole experience cut to the heart. It started at the beginning of the school holidays and will last the whole two weeks. 

So, what happened? There's a bunch of boys in his class and they were being disrepsectful to their teacher. Not putting super glue on the teachers chair or making her cry like one of my siblings dahaha.. but talking whilst she was talking and stuff like that. 


Ah, I can hear you now. 

"Sheesh, that's a bit hard"
"Boys will be boys"

Sorry, not in my backyard. My Tarlini and I were raised with respect as being one of the founding principles of the family. I would never even consider the notion of being disrespectul when I was his age. Yeah, yeah, it was a different time back then. It was also a time when these issues were handled with jandals and jug chords and upper cuts. Being the youngest, I think my parents got tired of it all by the time it got to me, so I was spared the rod a lot! 

We are into Week 2 of being banned. He is hurting. I've had a few pleas to let him on the computer. A few long sighs and attempted debates. I must admit he nearly got me a few times. My Tarlini is tougher than me. It's that mother-son thing. 


I was watching Police Ten 7 the other night and it made me angry! People weren't wearing seat belts, others had cannabis on them and they were just let off with warnings. I watch Tonight Tonight or ACA (one of the two) about a lady who attacked her housemate, stomped on her head and she got 22 stitches in her head. The attacker got 50 hours community service. LIke why the face already! I'm not saying that is where son is heading, but we got to nip these little negative behaviours in the butt right now. 

We spoke tonight about this horrible ordeal that he's living. I reminded him that it's self inflicted and when he looks back, he will remember this and maybe check himself before he says or does something he will regret. Yes, I think he's already learnt his lesson, but the ban sticks. 

Only 4 more days to go, but worth it for this one life lesson. 















Sunday 22 September 2013

Family Matters

There are many family matters that we can go on about, but this one is close to my heart and believe it or not, it's not about church (but happy to discuss that at any time!). 

This is about taking care of your family at times when you get sick or hurt and can't work anymore or it's your time to head up to the heavens. Yep, the big D - as in Death. 

You guessed it, this is about insurance. Specifically Life, Trauma, Total & Permanent Disablement (TPD) and Income Protection. 

I have been in the industry for about 5 years now and I am by no means an expert, but the stories you hear are incredible. Some can be incredibly amazing and some can be incredibly sad depending on each situation. 

The amazing stories are like those families who have been given cheques shortly after losing loved ones and how it has helped them. The incredibly sad ones are friends of advisers who have passed on and had no cover. 

Insurance is basically taking care of your family when you can't anymore for whatever reason. 

I have grown up in a culture where insurance is seen to be a non-essential. When people die, families and friend pull together and help the family in need through it. The community helps and that's how it has always been. We all know the money is just a small part of it all. Sharing grief, being there for each other and the strength of family is far more important. 

The reality is that after everyone has gone home, the bills still have to be paid. 

I know that if we include insurance as an essential, we can concentrate more on what we can offer emotionally rather than worrying about what you can give or what people will give financially. 

You will see and hear a lot of hype. There are a lot of companies out there selling similar products with various bells and whistles. The main thing is that you get the right advice for you. Do the research (read the fine print) or find a professional who will do it for you. Even if you do the research, get the professional advice you need. If you're unsure, ask questions and don't sign up to anything until you are 100% happy with it. 

The financial services industry is seriously regulated, so make sure the person you see ticks all the boxes. Be forthcoming when asking for qualifications etc. When they make recommendations to you, ask about the company's history, reputation with paying claims out and ask specifically why this company suits you compared to others.

Make sure the advice you get is personally fitted to you.
  • Do the research or get professional advice
  • Make sure the advice is personalised
  • Ask questions
I know you are thinking I can't afford a professional but this can as important as having a midwife when you're having a baby. You may not like what is happening but the end result is worth it all. 

Whether you believe in a next life or not - there is peace of mind knowing that your family is being take care of when you are not around any more. 

This is about far more than the money. This is about taking care of your family matters, so they don't have to. 













Saturday 14 September 2013

All You Need To Do Is Ask

Last week in Primary to support our Ward Mission Plan (I can hear them saying it - "Feed My Sheep"),  I challenged those bright wee souls to do two things. I told them that they really didn't actually have to do anything, just open their mouths. Their challenge: 

1. Ask their parents if the missionaries can come over for dinner. 
2. Ask one of their non-LDS friends or someone who hasn't been to church for a whle to come over for dinner at the same time.

It's a task that many adults shy away from but I encouraged them that all they needed to do was ask. I warned that some people may say no, but that was fine - at least they asked. One of the teachers said that it usually takes someone up to 7 times to be asked before they actually say yes. 

Yesterday I was very happy to find out that my youngest daughter Eliana and her friend Kaitlyn had been doing a bit of missionary work for a few weeks now. They organised a playdate with their friend from school. A few weeks ago, Eliana gave their friend an invitation for a playdate. Kaitlyn gave Eliana an invitation including volunteering her Dad to do the BBQ! I haven't seen the invitation Eliana gave out, but her friend's mother said it was very detailed, including the date, time and address of the park we were all going to meet at. The playdate was set for today. Kaitlyn's mum Kaiserina and I found out about it last night around 9:30pm haha. I managed to get hold of their friend's mum and since the girls had organised us, we decided to go ahead with it. 

We had a great time and it wasn't just about the missionary work. It was about getting to know one of Eliana's friends better as well. It started off bumpy as we all went to three different parks, but we got there! 




I was talking to Bishop at the park, and he said something that hit home. I spent most of the time playing with the children and he said it doesn't matter where you are, you are always the Primary President. He said when he's out and about in the community either riding his bike or whatever, he realised that even though people aren't members, he is their Bishop. And that means for all the primary children in the area, I'm their Primary President. For the rest of the day, I looked at every single child that I saw when I was out and about with a bit more care and a bigger smile. 

Today seeds were sown and invitations for upcoming primary activities were extended. Kaitlyn asked if she could say grace before the children ate - what a great example! I'm grateful that we reacted well to this surprise playdate and went along with it because it was obvious that the girls had put a lot of planning into it and it was obvious that this had been a point of discussion in the playground for a little while. I'm grateful that they took on the Primary Ward Mission Challenge with such gusto! I know you're thinking there was no missionary dinner. I think of this as a prelude event. 

I share this with you because if two 6yr olds can do it so can anyone. 

All you need to do is ask! 





Friday 13 September 2013

Reality Bites

There are two reality shows I am never going to watch: Big Brother & The Bachelor. It's plain and simply because I don't like them. Like what's the point? I mean, I know what the point is, but why do people find it so entertaining? 

Big Brother is basically us watching these people 24/7, build alliances, some guy (the lead peeping Tom) gives them instructions on things to do to get to stay in there longer. Admittedly, there are some pretty good prizes - whether in cash or in tangible goods, but nothing worth losing so much of your dignity over. There are those that grasp this 5 minutes of fame and use it to further a career in 'entertainment', but most are forgotten as yeterday's news. 

And it's not REAL reality. It's all just people doing it for the money or prizes. The real Big Brother doesn't include cameras, especially when you growing up in a Samoan home. Big Brother isn't the only one watching - there's big sisters, big mother and most of all big father! There are no cameras in the house but even though your father is fully subsonic snoring, he knows where there's an unfamiliar sound in the house, and if he asks if you are trying to hide something from him and you go to say something, he warns, "Shut up!" hahaha. There's suprise guests like Dad's "Peacemakers" or the chicken man (who delivered chickens and eggs) or the repo man. My sister actually wrote a song about him. You have your own Friday Night Games, running down the hallway and into a bedroom, and the jandal your mother throws still manages to hit you square in the back of the head. This is definitely an acquired skill and I didn't think I had it in me, until one day a few years ago my son said something cheeky to me, I jumped up and in one swift movement removed my jandal from my foot and threw it at him with Robin Hood-esque precision. Nominations are called family meetings, where I usually don't say anything but watch in awe of my parents and their management skills. Who needs Big Brother? 30 Justine Street & 60 Astrolabe Street, Cannons Creek: Now that's real.

The Bachelor: cringe! 25 girls trying to woo the heart of one guy... who uses the most romantic flower that lights up the eyes of the recipients and is the flower of death for those aren't given it. This is going to end well! One of my friends say she cannot stop watching it because there's something intriguing about the desparation of it all. I wonder if there are people around the world who have participated in these kind of shows and keep looking backwards because seriously, how can you top those dates? Where are you going to top dates that:

a) you don't have to pay 
b) they are doing some pretty cool stuff
c) everything is done for them

Man, I know some guys who get d) all of the above and they do it in the privacy of their own homes because 9/10 of them are still living at home. The other tenth doesn't live at home, but still comes home to get fed or their washing done.

Anyway, good news ladies. Presenting the most eligible bachelor I know at the moment - my cousin Johnathon who just returned home with honour from serving his LDS (Mormon) mission. Watch out cuz it's all on now. But you'll get a mix of The Bachelor and Big Brother here, because you'll have to get though his sister Tiare first. Good luck with that one girls. Now that's a show I'd like to see hahaha.









Sunday 8 September 2013

Dream Catchers

As a Latter-Day Saint , I believe that I have the right to receive inspiration or personal revelation as a mother, as an individual, and for my calling in church - which is currently looking after children aged 18 months - 11 yrs old (Primary). My end of the bargain is being ready and worthy to receive it. 

Inspiration or personal revelation is exactly that - personal. I believe how it is received is very personal too, and because Heavenly Father knows us individually, He delivers the news to us in the best way for us. 

For me, sometimes it's in the things I read or things peple say or do.  Or sometimes it's in my dreams.  (Remember it's relates to either my family, me or my calling - in case you think I'm cuckoo hahaha). 

My Tarlini and I have been talking about our respective callings over the last week and it has been on my mind. I love Primary! Sometimes the kids are more mature than me (true story), I just love how accepting they are and I love that they recognise truth more readily than adults. 


So here's my dream: 
_______________________________________________________

I was driving to work and for some reason there was a change on the motorway, and I ended up in Ipswich instead of Mt Gravatt haha. (Now before I go on, those that know me would know this is very plausible. Actually when I was dreaming it, I remember thinking - this is so me). Anyway, I'm in Ipswich and I have no idea how to get home. I stop the car and decide to walk into the first building I see. 

So, I walk in and out of one the doors in the building this woman walks out and I instantly recognise her. Our families grew up in the same town and she is the same age as of one of my sisters. I didn't know her well, but I knew her. I was happy to see her and asked for directions to get back to the motorway. Her directions were to follow this main road and I would get there. 

I get in the car, and follow the road and of course, I feel uncertain and lost again! The main road is parallel to a train track and I stop at the train station. I go inside the station and to my surprise I see someone I know again. She is someone I work with in Primary and I have known her for years. She points me in the right direction. 

I get in the car again and as I'm travelling down the road, I see two girls sitting on some steps and I recognise one of them. I know this little girl quite well and I knew she shouldn't be here. I don't remember who the other girl was, but I know she is part of our Primary. I stop the car, bundle them in the car and return them home to their families. 
_______________________________________________________

Well, I woke up feeling pretty happy. The reason I got lost was that there were two little girls that needed help returning home to their families and I was glad to be a part of that and there were people put in place to help along the way.  Some of the children that I serve in Primary I know quite well, and others I don't.. but somehow it is my task to help all of them return home with their families. 

For me, it was my personal confirmation that I am serving where I should be and there is so much work to do. 

I shared my dream with the mother of the little girl that I recognised today. As I shared it with her, we both recognised the feelings we were having and had a bit of a happy cry. Later she thanked me and talked about the influence I have on her children,and that as a leader there are things I can do for her daughter that she can't. What a great responsibility and privilege it is to serve in Primary. 

It may not be to Lehi's Dream proportions, but as I said before - it's a piece of my personal revelation that I will always treasure and I share it because it has strengthened my testimony and I hope it does yours. If you're wondering what the heck or why the face.. check this out: 





Sometimes it's not only about the dreams, but what you do once you've caught them.  


























Saturday 7 September 2013

Why We Do What We Do

I'm exhausted. 

I've been sick for a few days now with a cold. I just spent most of the day at my youngest kids' school fete selling shoes, to help my eldest kid and our youth group fundraise for their youth conference next year. For the rest of the day, I took them to my brother's house for a swim. They swam and I slept while the family watched them. (Love my family). 

Life is pretty busy and getting sick is just something else to deal with, because you've just to keep moving or else you will miss out.

What will you miss out on? The priceless moments: First steps, first tooth fairy visit, first school performances, first time playing a musical instruments, first speaking assignment at church.

I am not a stay at home mum (SAHM). It is something that can be frowned upon, but it's something that I'm not ashamed of because at the moment, it is what's best for our family. To be honest, I am in awe of SAHMs. It is the hardest work in the universe. It is something that my Tarlini is way better at than I am, and I will freely admit it. But, because I am not a SAHM, it doesn't mean that I don't take my role as a mum very seriously. The Family: A Proclamation to the World confirms my duties: 


"Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children". 

And that's what I try to do. For the record, I am not a super mum either. I'm too tired for that nonsense dahahaha. 



I hope like me, they will look back on their childhoods and think about how awesome it was. They will thank their father for teaching them how to cook and clean properly, the importance of manners and honouring priesthood. They will remember how their mother taught them how to love the Lord, how she has a song for every moment, and how to see the funny side in every occasion. 

Life is exhausting and exhilarating. Sometimes it sucks and sometimes it's amazeballs. Sometimes I wrestle with my son and sometimes I let the girls do my nails or put make up on me even though I have zero interest in that girlie stuff. But that's life. 

For us it's pretty simple. There are three reasons why we do what we do. Our other heartbeats:  

Chelynne, Braedyn & Eliana. 











Thursday 5 September 2013

Election Schma-lecton

I'm not voting. I don't care about the fines. 

Actually, I can't vote because I'm a kiwi that arrived after 26 February 2001. We have been in Australia for 8 years and we are no closer to becoming citizens. The red tape is reee-donk-u-lous. If you can go through this website and figure it out, let me know. I've tried a lot of times. 

Our youngest daughter was born in Sydney and when she turns 10, she can become a citizen, but we cannot access the services she may need on her behalf because we are not citizens. 

We will help pay for the National Disability Insurance Scheme (NDIS) through our taxes, but we will not be able to access it because we're not Australian Citizens. 

At the moment we will have to pay for our eldest two children to go through Univesity here, or they will have to go home to study as they will not be able to access student loans. 

We add value to this country and are grateful for all it offers us. We will probably live the rest of our lives here but unless things change, we will never really feel 100% welcome here. 

There are a few groups that are pushing the cause like OzKiwi and I admire the hard work they do. My support is sharing statuses or signing their petition because that's all I can do right now. 

The reason I'm not intensely involved in pushing causes is some people go too far and get blinded by personal agendas. And then it gets sad. 

For now, I will continue to contribute to my community and carry on. Yes, it is frustraing and it is important to me, but not as important as making sure the children grow up to be extrordinary people and be whatever they dream to be. 

Plus, the youngest one can be Australian in a few years and can look after all of us dahahaha, oh and we are the world champions of both Union & League.. Cheeehooo!




All I ask is that who ever is elected, please be kind. Even just a little bit :).